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Hellooooooo! And welcome to the 171st EVER newsletter from rathergood!

HAPPY NEW YEAR! Welcome to the glorious 2013! Year of the Colossal Squid!

Look what I've got for you today! I've teamed up with the highly attractive and beguiling-smelling Ross Butter to bring you the first in a series entitled “I Love You So Hard” - some of you may recognise the genesis of these wonderful films:

http://rathergood.com/all-sketches/iloveyou1.html

The big news over the holidays was that Uncle Wormsley's Christmas aired, and got loads of attention from the press. If you have access to Sky Go you can still watch it for another 15 days (at the time I'm writing this). Here are some choice quotes:

“This macabre offering ranks as one of the darkest festive morality tales ever conceived” - The Observer

“...gloriously grotesque cautionary tale” - The Mail On Sunday

“dark and rather wonderful” - i

“A weird, exciting half-hour break from the norm” - The Guardian

“Funny, dark and frequently disturbing” - Time Out

I blogged about the press here if you're interested in how all this stuff panned out:

http://t.co/2um20HT6

I think that's about it for today except to tell you how hard I love you. I love you SO HARD! I'd do anything for you!

You'll never be thirsty again! I've got a new juicer and it makes awesome juice. I'll make juice for you! I'll juice all the fruit and veg, and when that's all juiced I'll just shove my hand in and juice that. If you're still thirsty I'll spoon out my eyes and juice them, then shove a leg in, then my tongue.

Basically I'll just keep shoving bits of me in to that juicer until I'm not physically capable of shoving any more bits in, but I'll have a specially trained sheepdog that will pick up whatever's left of me and feed that in to the juicer as well so that in the end I'm completely juiced and you will be completely refreshed.

THEN YOU WILL LOVE ME BACK.

Mwah mwah superhugs!

Yours sincerely

Joel Veitch

Founder of rathergood.com
Member of the International Academy of Digital Arts and Sciences
Winner of 3 Webby Awards
Master of Arts (Electronic Media) Oxford Brookes
Bachelor of Arts (English and History) University of Leeds
Marksman (.22, 5.56, 7.62, LMG)
Former Sixer of Grey Six, 19th Forest Hill Cub Scouts
Former Member of MGS school cricket team
Former Sergeant, Combined Cadet Force (RAF Section)
Silver Swimming Badge
3rd best Cross Country runner in my class at age 12
Once had a letter published in the New Scientist
Attended one-night Pork Butchery Course
Keen amateur ukulele player
Bronze lifesavers swimming badge
Full clean driver's license
Passed Cycling Proficiency Test
A levels – English Literature, French and History, all grade A
GCSEs 7xA 2xB
Good understanding of the principals of flight
Good understanding of the principles of spelling
Winner of the Head's Prize for Progress, first year, Aylesford School
50 meters swimming badge
Once did a wee in a loo containing Dannii Minogue's wee
25 meters swimming badge
Amateur experimental rocket / meat scientist
Has caught piranhas on a hand line
Willing to learn semaphore if required
Able to sing The Girl From Ipanema and Mas Que Nada in Portuguese
Survivor of Trans-Atlantic Airplane Fire Horror
Wielder Of The Power Of Science
Inventor of the Dictator Finger Thingdicator
Defeater of Transformers (regardless of voltage)
Founder member of the super-secret League Of Internet Justice
Has eaten chicken madras for breakfast
Commander In Chief of Pork Force
Saver Of Old Ladies In Distress
Owner of Monster Truck
Experienced lawn mower
Finder of camouflaged flip-flops
Amateur Marine Biologist
Vaguely knowledgeable about steam engines
Paper Plane Expert
The man behind many of the Internet’s biggest online successes (London Evening Standard 6 October 2010)
Pie Master
Some bloke who makes cat videos on the internet (copyright Aleks Krotoski)
Kitten Wrangler Extraordinaire
Inventor of Hairy Tongue
Christmas Tree Decorator of some renown
Able to slow kittens to 1/40th the speed of a normal kitten
Fan of all ungulates
Moon Baron
Able to do a passable impersonation of a trumpeting elephant
Fixer of aircraft using glue, tape and bog roll
Cyborg Warrior
Repairer of small shock absorbers
Owner of a skin-tight lycra suit
Knower of some stuff about pulse jets
Able to identify many cartilaginous fish
Painter of RC cars
Able to fly a radio control plane briefly before crashing and destroying it
Knows what a lift pump is in a diesel engine
Understands clutch shoes
Loop-the-looper extraordinaire!
Getting less bad at soldering
Has a vague understanding of the advantages and disadvantages of a small propeller spinning quickly vs a big propeller spinning slowly
Knows that volts times amps equals watts
Father of Ultimate Nail Baby
Hasn't even mentioned that he cut the tip of his finger off because he's so brave
Builder of Sausage Drone
Not responsible for anyone injuring themselves while attempting dangerous erotic freefall
Popular amongst Dominicans with sexually confusing genetic disorders
HABATAAAAAAG enthusiast
Milkman impersonator
Stallion Explosion
Drummer on stranded buoys
Killer of tree stump
Barbequer of delicious sardines
Rat control expert
Wears a clean pair of underpants every single day, no exceptions
Juicing enthusiast