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Searching for very large pearls

I am very classy and glamorous. For this reason I am very fond of pearls. Now, everyone knows pearls come from oysters, but these oyster pearls are limited in size by the size of the oyster itself.

If you got your pearls from bigger animals, then they would be bigger pearls. Stands to reason. So, for a long time now, I've been looking in donkeys. I reckon, if you scale it up, a donkey pearl must be about a foot and a half across. I'm going to be SO rich when I find a donkey pearl! So far though, the donkeys just seem to be full of blood and lungs and entrails and half-digested food and stuff. No pearls yet.

You know, I've been dong this for a long time, and I've looked in a LOT of donkeys. Really, loads and loads of them. I'm beginning to wonder whether I should be looking in horses instead. Or rhinos maybe.

Pearls form around grains of sand, so I'm told. It could be that the donkeys I'm looking in aren't getting enough sand. It could be that I should find some small donkeys and rub sand in them. Give them a few years to grow and form pearls, keep rubbing the sand in, then open them up and see if there's any pearls inside. Maybe I should give that a go. It sounds like a lot of work though, constantly rubbing sand into donkeys for years, without knowing for sure if they'll make pearls.